


i've been loving you for quite some time

by terriblemuke (lylacs)



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: "Never Seen Anything Quite Like You", Based on a song, Best Friends, Fluff, Fluff I guess, Friends to Lovers, M/M, One Shot, Still bad at tagging, ashton and luke are briefly mentioned, because i love red hair in general, by The Script, in some sense, malum, malum one shot, michael's natural hair is red, they don't make an appearance here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-19
Updated: 2015-01-19
Packaged: 2018-03-08 05:31:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3197189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lylacs/pseuds/terriblemuke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The five times Calum realized he loved Michael.</p><p>[edited]</p>
            </blockquote>





	i've been loving you for quite some time

**Author's Note:**

> the summary's pretty confusing. When I say "loved", I meant the really strong emotion, not that Calum only loved Michael in those five instances, of course not. But there were five times when the emotion was at it's strongest, in different situations that all revolve around Michael.
> 
> (title from a lyric from Stay [Stay Stay] by Taylor Swift bc i love that song)

**1.**

Calum is ten and he dislikes school, like every other kid who has to wake up around five to seven in the morning just to be forced to attend and listen to boring lectures and do extremely hard exams and projects. But, like every other kid, attends and endures this hell he'll be stuck in for now and for years to come, because that's what they're supposed to do.

He's tired and stayed up late helping his older sister practice for her performance, which is today, after school. He was so concentrated on his sister that he neglected to do his project that takes up almost half of his grade in the subject that he's coincidentally failing and it's due today. He forgets entirely about the project until the teacher mentions it and orders all her students to pass it, and Calum panics because he didn't do it so he can't submit it since there's nothing to give and his teacher's strict and doesn't accept excuses - which are all she'll find when people try to explain - so there's no way he can get out of the trouble that's approaching him.

When his teacher approaches him asking for his project, he's silent, trying to come up with the possible excuses that he knows won't suffice and won't be bought, but he just wants to kill time and maybe convince her to give him one more day to do it. He can't get a zero at this project, especially when his other projects and exams were a low grade and then the only thing he'd have to hold onto in hopes of passing besides this project is the final exam, and he's completely hopeless at that.

Then someone taps the teacher's shoulder, catching her attention and both of them turn to Michael, Calum's classmate, handing the teacher his project, claiming it was Calum's and that he forgot it at home so his mom asked Michael to bring it to school for him, since Michael came to class late. Never has Calum felt so thankful for his best friend for saving him. The teacher eyes Michael and Calum suspiciously before accepting it and asking Michael how about  _his_  project, to which he easily replies that he forgot to do it.

The teacher probably suspected something from that but doesn't say anything, just says Michael gets a zero for not doing it and forces him and Calum back to their seats.

And yeah, that's when he realized he kinda loved Michael. He just saved him from getting a zero and it's kind of funny because it's a strange way of realizing he loved him, but back then it was more of "thank god for coming to the rescue I love you for that" even though Michael got a zero in the process of giving him his work. Calum does feel kind of bad, but the sly grin that Michael sends him when they take their seats tells him that he shouldn't feel bad because he isn't disturbed by it, though Michael whispers to him and tells him to be more responsible next time, and that "love" he felt for Michael changed into a realization of how lucky he is to have a friend like Michael, who during lunch takes out a notebook and starts teaching him and explaining all the lessons about the subject for the final exam, to make him understand it more and help him pass the exam he's dreading about.

**2.**

Hands sweating, Calum's never felt so out of place and nervous.

The formal clothes he's wearing feel too tight on him, clinging to him and he's worried that the sweat he's excreting will go to the clothes and he'll be dead if that happens. He feels like he doesn't belong in a fancy place like this, but he wouldn't be here if not for Michael, and is worried that he'll somehow case a scene and embarrass himself, which is ironic because all he'll be doing the whole time is watching, he wasn't the one performing.

He wonders how Michael's dealing with the fact that he'll be performing right in front of hundreds of people. Calum's pretty sure if that happened to him he'd shit his pants.

He's wedged between Michael's mother and some stranger - only he was invited to attend Michael's recital, he feels honored, but also feels a bit sad that he couldn't bring his sister, too, she would've enjoyed this - in the middle of one of the rows and he feels anxious for Michael, and maybe for himself because what if he has to use the restroom? How can he weave his way through all these people who probably would be distracted because of him?

All his thoughts are pushed aside when a speaker appears on stage and announces that the performances would be starting soon, and Michael's mom looks at Calum with an excited expression, obviously expecting a lot from this recital. Calum doesn't even know anything about this recital except that Michael's playing, and judging from the location, would be playing classical music. It makes Calum wonder what Michael would play because he isn't fond of that kind of music. His instrument isn’t exactly something that you play in an opera house or somewhere extremely fancy and old-fashioned.

Soon the performances start, playing various instruments, all connected to the classical-style of playing. He finds it amazing how all of them are performed so splendidly, and he wonders when it would be Michael's turn, because as impressive as all the performances were, it was his that Calum was excited for the most.

From his side Michael's mother is quietly fretting over how Michael would be doing because everyone's done magnificently and maybe he wouldn't be as good as them. Calum highly doubts it, because he knows Michael's musically talented, just maybe not in the same way as everyone else.

When the boy finishes performing and leaves the stage Calum sees familiar red hair peeking out of the curtains and then suddenly is pushed forward, revealing Michael in a fancy white suit that looks good against the bright red hair and pale skin that only belongs to him. In his hand is his instrument, the familiar old guitar he's always hears him play with when he goes to Michael’s house, and he immediately rushes to the seat that stays in the middle of the stage, getting into position and actually forgetting to bow down before turning to the instrument, and just goes straight to playing.

That tiny issue is soon forgotten - who cares about some stupid bow anyway? - and soon the room is filled with the beautiful melody he's producing when his fingers immediately press against the strings, forming certain positions to play the right chords as his other hand strums to create the sound he wanted to make.  

It enchants the entire audience, entirely focused on how the sounds flow out and the flawlessness and grace of Michael's playing. Calum finds it amazing because it's not a classical piece he's playing, but he finds himself starting to believe that it is, as if Michael altered the tune to make it sound classic but at the same time very recognizable that it's an actual song with lyrics. And it’s so amazing, because he’s playing it on  _guitar_ , where most songs like what he’s playing originates from, yet it sounds so different.

Once the song finishes, it doesn't seem to really hit Calum. It's like the song's remnants are still present in the atmosphere and he's still caught up in that that he forgot that it was finished.

It's the sudden clapping of hands that snap Calum out of it and he joins the chorus of applause as Michael stands up holding the instrument and bows, looking at the audience and his eyes meet Calum's for a second and his green eyes seem to glow a shade brighter and then Calum's hit with this overwhelming sense of love for this boy who's looking at him through the crowd with this knowing look in his face and his grin is strangely sly, like he knows something.

Calum guesses it's a sense of pride for his best friend, because it was a wonderful performance and one of the best he's ever witnessed, and it seems that everyone else in the auditorium seems to agree.

**3.**

The tie looks so wrong on him, so misplaced, which is why Calum keeps on fiddling with it every five seconds. It's hard to blame him for being so nervous though, anxiety has been a normal feeling for him - nothing serious, of course, just the normal panicking you get when you're a clueless teenager - especially when it comes to his best friend and something important. He always gets the feeling that he'll screw up, things won't go as he plans them to, and he doesn't like it when that happens, though who does, really?

He knows he shouldn't be nervous - he  _always_ knows this - because it's just Michael, just his best friend for around eight years. And that's probably why he's so nervous about this, because it's  _Michael_. And he's taking his best friend to the prom, and it's kind of a big deal to him, because he's Michael, and he's Calum. And it's different when he's with Luke and Ashton, his and Michael’s other two friends, because even though they're his best friends too, they're not  _Michael_  and Michael will always have a special place in Calum's mind and heart, always is something special in Calum's eyes, someone more than family and a best friend.

That feeling of anxiety disappears though when he enters Michael's room to check on him. Yeah, Calum may be his date, but he's also his best friend. He gets special privileges that no one Michael gets with would get.

He expects to see his usually perfect pretty little Michael in a beautiful tuxedo like him - only different color perhaps - with his epic [punk rock] eyeliner - guyliner - that only he could nail and blush he usually places on his cheeks for some reason, maybe to make him look cuter, Calum doesn't know [or care, Michael's beautiful no matter what]. Michael can do whatever he wants to do - and his hair combed neatly to look formal, but it's actually the complete opposite. There's no suit, no makeup, no fancy hairstyle.

In fact, Michael just wearing jeans and a Green Day shirt with worn out sneakers. There's nothing artificial on his face, and Calum can see the tiny not so noticeable acne on his forehead and a tiny healing scratch between his eyebrows. His red hair is tousled and messy and sticking out in all places, like he just woke up and Michael looks so simple and so ordinary, so unlike Michael because Michael always dresses the best and always looks like it but at the same time Calum thinks, simplicity fits Michael, makes him look more genuine, and that's beautiful, as beautiful or even more beautiful as he is when he's suited up. Calum thinks he loves Michael like this, looking like this.

Michael's digging into his backpack as he walks towards Calum's direction, before raising his head and noticing his best friend's presence.

"So no more prom?" Calum guesses. "I even dressed up for it." He pouts.

"Thought of something better to do." is all Michael says, walking past him, out of his room, not even sorry for not telling Calum about it. Michael looks at him from up to down, examining his attire before smirking. "It is a nice outfit though. Classy."

"And a waste, too, judging from your outfit." Calum points out.

Michael shrugs, shoving his hands in his pockets. "At least you're all dolled up and nice. Not that the place requires such things, thus my attire, but at least you're looking good."

"So do you, even without all the glamour you usually have when we go out. It actually looks better." Calum admits.

"Thanks." Michael smiles. "Now, come on. Let's go. I'll drive."

Michael can walk casually downstairs even at his attire even though he's supposed to be dressed for the prom because his parents are apparently not home, and they trust Calum enough - they're great friends with his parents and were like second parents to him - to take care of their son, not that he really needed taking care of. They head to Calum's car and he hops in the passenger seat while Michael takes the one beside him.

In all honesty, Calum's kind of disappointed that they aren't going to the prom, because his parents told him it was a once in a lifetime experience that you pretty much need in your life. And Calum's missing on it. But it's alright, he thinks, because he'd rather spend time with Michael doing whatever than spend time in the school gym doing nothing and attempting to dance with some of his classmates that he'd definitely is awkward with. (Ashton and Luke would definitely be no help, even if they would be there.)

He's confused as to why they're there when they reach their destination. Michael parks the car and soon they're standing in front of a familiar old brown house. Memories flash in Calum's mind when he stares at it. An abandoned worn down house that used to stand tall and proud and white and beautiful that held a family that thought they'd never have to leave. Memories of two childhood best friends playing hide-and-seek and tag around the yard and a family that always did karaoke every New Year with their neighbours.

And then the fire that burned it all down. The accident that made them move out and find a better home, one that would give them more memories, better ones to make up for the ones they possibly lost in that house.

Michael tugs on Calum's arm, knowing that he's recalling everything that happened to him when he was younger. It was such a tragedy, really, something better off forgotten, but Michael brought him here for a reason. He drags Calum towards the large tree that stood by the fence - Calum can't believe that tree still stands, even until now, it never burned along with the house - and points upwards, and his eyes follow Michael's eyes and Calum's eyes widen at the sight of something he thought was already a memory, still there and alive.

Michael nudges Calum to climb up, already reaching to the tree. He already starting to climb when Michael looks back and notices Calum hasn't moved, because of his clothes, obviously worried that they might get torn if he started climbing. Michael laughs. "If you're careful enough, then maybe they won't rip." He advises.

Calum hesitates but he follows Michael anyway, wanting to see and remember how it was like to live a beautiful memory. He's surprised with how he still knows how to climb, not having done it for years. Michael seems like a natural, though she always  _was_  one. He's the one who taught Calum how to climb trees when they were twelve after all. Michael's already up and looking down, waiting for Calum to reach him.

Soon they're lying down on the floor beside each other of Calum’s old tree house, staring at the night sky with the full moon up through the large window.

"I can't believe this is still here, after all these years." Calum says in awe. "How'd you find this place?"

"I was just driving around, trying to kill some time, and then my mind immediately thought of this place and I ended up driving here. I couldn't believe I remembered the directions to this house my dad gave me on how to get here and was actually able to use it." Michael explains. "So I found this place, found out that it was still intact, just recently, actually, like four days ago, and I decided, and why not show you this place during prom? When it's just the two of us? I figured this would be more worthwhile than the dance," he pauses. "But if you want, now that I showed you this place, we can go attend already. It's still early and we'll still make it."

"I don't think your clothes are suited for it."

"Doesn't really matter. They aren't strict about the dress code anyway. I definitely will look pretty weird though." Michael says.

"It's okay. I don't really want to go anymore."

"Oh?" Michael raises an eyebrow at him. "This is better?"

"Yeah." Calum says. "Brings back memories."

"I'm glad, I guess." He says. "If they're good memories, of course."

Calum laughs. "Definitely good." His hand finds Michael's and their fingers entwine.

"Play some music, will you?" Calum asks after a silence, after both were starting to drift off into their own thoughts.

"Okay." Michael lets go of Calum's hand to get his phone and search for music. Calum waits for a song to start playing from the device and then he sits up, looking at Michael with a quirked eyebrow when he recognizes the song and Michael understands his expression.

"What?" He says innocently. "I like this song."

"It's pretty overplayed and starting to get annoying, even though it's pretty old." Calum says.

"Hey," Michael playfully shoves him. "I love this song."

"I know."

"This would be a great wedding song."

"Clearly, considering the lyrics." Calum says.

"I think I would like this song to be played on my wedding." Michael continues.

Calum looks at Michael funny, because why is he suddenly thinking about weddings? But Michael just flashes him that award-winning clever smile of his and Calum forgets about asking and all he says is, "Noted. I'll be sure to tell the groom that when he'll be asking me about how you want the wedding to be."

"I don't think you need to tell him anymore." Michael says softly, standing up.

He gives Calum his hand and he accepts it, standing up. "Wanna dance?"

As they move around the small area they were in - it's actually quite big, but when you dance like you're in a ballroom, it's obviously much smaller - Calum thinks about what Michael said. He doesn't really understand the statement, but at the same time, he feels like he knows what it means, somehow, in an odd way. Like his mind is into this secret thing with Michael that he's unaware of, and it's his own mind. Or his heart. He doesn't know.

When it comes to Michael, Calum can't really tell the difference, especially when both revolve around him.

**4.**

He never thought colours could blind someone or irritate them, but that was until he sees white on literally everything in the room. He hates it, he's pretty sure everyone else who attended hates it, too, except his mom. It looks like she's purposely - or not, he does not know his mother's true intentions, who does when it comes to weddings, anyway? - trying to make white the thing that stands out for this event, but it won't be, and he knows he shouldn't waste his time being irritated or blinded by that because the main focus is what's in front, in the center, and who will be standing in the center waiting for the one who would walk the aisle covered with a red carpet.

These thoughts are only with Calum now because he's nervous - god when will he stop being so nervous, he thinks to himself - and when he's nervous, he likes to distract himself by doing or thinking of things that he notices, which is sometimes everything or just one specific thing. He has the urge to fiddle with his collar but he doesn't because he might end up doing something embarrassing and no one wants a bad wedding, especially when it's yours.

Calum's thoughts are taken away when the doors swing open quite dramatically and Michael enters the scene, his hair fixed, wearing a simple but at the same time noticeable black tuxedo that makes his green eyes look brighter. Michael's captivating in so many ways, the obvious one - he's the groom and the star here - and the fact that his clothes are the only one that stands out that isn't white, which Calum is very thankful for - because even his are, unfortunately.

As Michael's walking down the aisle, it's as if it grows longer and he's so far away from the altar, where Calum's waiting, and Calum wants nothing to do than run to the redhead and literally sweep him off his feet and carry him to the altar, or, if Calum had the choice, carry Michael out of the church and just skip to the party so they can go on their honeymoon, but Calum doesn't, and they still have to do the vows.

The music is playing, the song that Michael wanted to have and said he would have five years ago, and Calum feels like laughing at the timing of when the song goes,  _"But watching you stand alone"_  because it really is a perfect song for a wedding, basically explains what it feels like for the bride - or groom, in his case - to actually get married, and the song is an obvious answer for Michael's thoughts at the moment, even though Calum doesn't need a song to interpret what his love's thinking. (But it's nice to know that Michael would love him for _a thousand years_ and more.)

All the nervousness Calum once had is totally gone, the sudden thought that, hey, I'm marrying this boy, my best friend, the person I've been with for perhaps thirteen years, and person I'd be with for even more than that, and he feels blessed, because it's not everyday marriage between best friends happen, especially the kind Michael and Calum have. Michael soon finds his way beside Calum and the ceremony officially starts.

It seems to take forever though, and there's nothing Calum wants to do more than tell the priest to skip to the vows because he can't wait to have Michael made officially his forever.

Michael seems to notice Calum's impatience because his hand rests on top of his and Calum turns to Michael's direction to see him smile. That Michael-like smile that means so many things, have so much different meanings each time, but are always meant for Calum, trying to tell him so many things that sometimes he doesn't know, but sometimes he does, in some weird way. Calum smiles back, and Michael squeezes his hand, as if to tell him,  _don't worry, I'm as impatient as you are, but this'll be over soon_.

Calum really can't wait for soon, but he does.

(He doesn't hesitate or waste a single second to kiss Michael like his life depends on it.)

(Michael laughs at him afterwards because his lips are red and puffy from kissing too hard and Calum looks pretty stupid with it but Calum doesn't care, because he knows by stupid Michael means Calum is stupidly in love - and it's  _true_ , so why not let everyone know?)

**5.**

The familiar guitar playing through the whole house is something he'll never get tired of, Calum thinks. Even when Michael's been playing it for almost fifty years and even made a living out of it as a famous musician. Michael’s legacy. Calum’s was very different – a football athlete – but still something Michael was proud of. They were both proud of what they achieved in their adulthood, together.

Michael's playing his music right now, as Calum asked, though he never really has to ask, because Michael plays it everyday, even at his old age. He always has enough strength for the guitar and for family. They're in their bedroom, Calum sitting in his rocking chair and Michael playing to him. They're both enjoying what they're doing, they like how they're spending their 50th anniversary, even if it's without their children and their children. They get that their busy with work, and in other countries, and actually, they don't mind it at all, because it's just the two of them, always had been since the beginning, when they were kids, and even when they're old like right now and they're alone in the house and it feels like some sort of sign by fate saying that even if no one else is there with them, they'll always have each other until the very end.

Neither of them actually realizes the song finishes until Michael's fingers stop when they've finished doing what they're supposed to do. They look at each other before Michael stands up and places his guitar back in its case and Calum starts playing music of their time from the speakers around the room.

Michael approaches him and helps him stand up and Calum's hands find Michael's waist and Michael's hands wrap around Calum's neck and soon they're dancing, slowly, to the music playing.

The music becomes a soft hum to Calum's mind, something only there for him to have a guide on how to move himself and Michael around the room, because he finds Michael much more entrancing, and always has.

He sees the wrinkles of old age on his husband's forehead and the grayish red hair - he doesn't understand how the red still stays but doesn't ask - that's still messy like when they were younger, and his eyes are still the same green they were when they got married, when they stayed at the tree house instead of prom, when it was their first concert they were performing together, when they were spending time together at whatever age doing whatever things. And no matter how old Calum is he'll never get tired of that colour looking at him with so many different thoughts running through and so many emotions that he's so in love with, and he'll never get tired of that smile Michael makes - like right now, because Michael notices that Calum's distracted, as usual - that makes his green eyes always go a shade brighter, as if his mood lightens, no matter what Michael's thinking or feeling, and Calum will never get tired of realizing how much he loves making Michael smile like that, making his eyes shine like that, how Michael takes Calum's breath away every time he sees him, how much Calum loves being with him and really would never trade any moment with Michael for anything in the world.

And Calum will never get tired of realizing how much he loves this boy he's dancing with, he's holding and will continue to hold until the day he dies, because that's love, that's what loving someone is like. 

And Calum loves Michael. So, so much. 

**Author's Note:**

> this was originally written in a het version, even though the idea was intended for a malum one shot. so sorry if i've made any errors. i edited it but i might have overlooked some things.
> 
> hopefully this wasn't bad. thanks for reading :)


End file.
